The itch

Salutations to whoever may fall upon this post...

My hand itched to write & Ive re-written this post about 5 times : rust has become me.

So what I’ll do, seeing as I want to post something is to share an extract from an old poetry book of mine, when I breathed words.

I miss that old me, and pay homage to that “me” through this ( and promise to try revive that spirit in me once again ), hope you enjoy it :

Trapped’s the new in :

The new in I hear,

The latest trend everybody seems to have caught onto.

It’s become the epitome of suburbia who’ve become materially-claustrophobic.

It’s succumbed to being the adolescent’s idol, who’ve found solace in suicide.

It’s become the scapegoat for the creatively-challenged maniacs.

It’s befriended straightjackets and has found companionship with muzzles.

Oh, it’s reigned tyranny at every successful coup.

It’s become a sanctuary for the silent,

and is viewed as a fiend by the free.

This thing called LIFE.

If somebody had told me how BORING growing up is, I'd have suckled on my childhood for as long as possible.
I swear the next time I hear a kid say " when I grow up " in that silly matter-of-fact sing-song voice I will DROP-KICK, CHOKE-SLAM & STIFF-ARM A BRAT!
For I envy the joy & carefree spirit they're still entitled to, which as you grow up you spend more energy trying to achieve & preserve & yet for most it's like a ghost which many claim to have seen, and yet very few know.

I've found the major root of my misery at most times, and it's been in my pocket all this time.
Yessir, it's that mint in your hand or that scrumpled note deep down in your jeans after a good-night out.
Oh yes, the Big-Five!
You see when I have it, Im invincible, but the minute it borders on extinction, survival mode kicks in & happy pills are on-call.

Now I don't want no self-righteous, meditating fart telling me money isn't everything.
Your ass is all pretzel-shaped & afloat somewhere after having had your had in a nice big cookie-jar!
So up until I can sit calmly with my pelvis next to my mouth, chanting God-knows-what I'll keep having it as my focal point.

Just like a kid needs to fall & crack a scalp to know that even Superman can't fly ( unless levitating due to other powers-that-be ).
I also wanna do IT!

So seeing as the 1st step to anything is having a plan, here's a draft of mine :

A BUDGET.

Yup that good old system of monitoring your cash-flow to see how close you are to the red robot, and quickly finding ways to avoid it.

In the coming month, I'd like to be as disciplined as the nuns are around the Father of the house, and see what virtues I'll gain close to the next month-end.

Just like when as a kid, you'd be tortured by the family GP for 10 seconds with his needle deeply nestled in your lil buttocks & as you screamed for the neighbourhood to hear...
He'd miraculously whip out a lollipop & a smile which wiped the slate clean & you hobbled out of there all smiles.

So you see folks for you to gain, you need pain.
Yep black gals know only too well what this stupid line means!
 As you sit having your scalp terrorised by some unfriendly wench, only to leave there as Lil Miss Muffet, waiting on all the Georgies to donate their hearts to you.

So sure, I can't eat out as much as I would like, can't turn Long Street short as often as I enjoy...
But what I can do is gemme wheels 2 or 4, dependant on the sense of urgency I feel & last and certainly NOT least : I can smile more, as I'll be minus the anxiety I so often experience each time I play peek-a-boo with the ATM.

So let's give it a try shall we & see how much self-discipline this young thang has.

Pray for me brethren, as I'll need all the strength I can get.

-_-

Mandi's Monday

Hello luffs,

A few birdies have been chirping me about my lack of blogging...
I dint realise people ACTUALLY enjoy these brain-farts!
So with a lil bit more self-esteem from here on, I promise to give all you sweerharts something to read 1ce a week.

Today, I did something I've been promising to do.
I won't say what until it's been like 3mths, where I can feel proud of myself & standing ovations will be due.

Every so often I hit a slump, where I'm Humpty Dumpty stuck in Timothy Traddle's toenail & all is bleak.
But the minute I manage to snap out of it, I'm like Michael Jackson, walking through Boys' Town!

So this marks me being happy again.

I promise to enjoy my week, I owe it to myself.

Wishin you all the same & more.

Animo et Fide

Mayne am I loved

As I’ve always said, I’m a christian by birth, i was baptised and raised in in the way of Jesus Christ, whom I always call to whenever life gets bleak, as it tends to every so often , when you least want it to.

So, keeping with  the theme of it being a Sunday & everyone subscribing to FaithBook lemme have my 20 seconds of fire & THANK God for the love I experience EACH DAY!

I’ll start of with my family :

I’ve been blessed to be born into a smart, HARD-WORKING family where NEVER-SAY-DIE is our morning chant, where life & all it’s haters will hit you with their pungency & YET you’re still able to wake up & sing “khoombaya” with tears welling up in your eyes, because you know omission of joy welcomes mild depression like the squattter camps outside Hout Bay, which leads to a lifestyle depreciation : ETERNALLY! 

Now I dunno who appreciated the ADORABLE NooNas as my image, but that is my my family’s new release, called Libonge, which means Appreciate, who apparently looks like me, whom I love dearly because his mum, as my sister has devoted herself to the worst younger sister life can burden you with.

For you see friends I’m not a bed of roses, yet I’m blessed with people who accept me as I am & my siblings are no exception.

I cannot count the number of times I have emotionally blackmailed finances out of them , based on their understanding of me & how their love of me never wavers.

My youngest sister says I’m a bully : rightfully so, as I’m not her friend, we’re in each others life to torment the other ( so I believe ), but let you be the scapegoat that so much as pops her bunion : your ancestors will be suffocate you for me!

For you see brethren, when it comes to those I was born & raised with, you come a dismal 3rd & I will defend to kill, if need be.

You see, some high philosopher says you’re born alone, but my mum has taught me you enter alone, but you’re made by those who went through it with you!

That said eternity doesn’t stretch far enough for how I feel about my family, for I’ve learned, friends are the family you choose & they are the ones you embrace until you find ground-level.

That said,to my family I promise to love your off-spring like they were mine for the care you’ve shown to your diliquent sibling!

Now before I cry a river , I do feel there’s another  group who deserve my patty ( read older posts ).

I’ll end-off with my extended family & friends :

Now I grew up with boys.

It’s VERY uneasy to not cry when your female 5-year old HORmones tell you to, but because you’re in a minority you save  face, even though you literally ate dust in a game of contact rugby, because all your dolls were euthanised as you’re stuck with your ageing granny & telling on, would only result in you missing a next meal as vengeance from the majority. ( having a mouth doesn’t always guarantee justice )

Boys well done you taught a spoilt-brat how it is to be stranded & survive : I fear nobody as I learnt through yall pain is just a mindset & as my crazy cousin would say : pain is for the weak & tears for losers. The boot-camp manual was actually created by yall.
I sincerely THANK YOU.

To my friends :

You have come to embrace an emotional, goal-oriented friend who wants plans implemented & running by 30, which means you’re often left looking in my shadow, for your friend.

You see love, the day you find your passion all else falls back & many a time to 1’s detriment.

Understand 1-thing : the love & affection’s still the same, but priorities changed drastically.
I may not physically be there, but you matter.

I love you, regardless.

Life blesses you with stages, where you choose where & what you want out of all situations, that stated ponder this : 

LOVE ONLY THOSE WHO MATTER.

Dangerously inspired

WoW what a week of a year it's been, my year started on my baby's befday : 5th of January when I was weaned from my mom's everlasting nourishment & sent to heaven in the form of Cape Town.

Since I got here I have been blessed with good company, humour & joy amidst all the amok which precedes somewhere in the crevices of my universe.

I know Im blessed when a mere pauper is allowed to eat from Willoughby's at lunch, watch the sun set at Signal Hill, and shame my ( orthodox ) mama on Long.

Tomorrow I jump my biggest hurdle & cross the finish line victorious, as I'm about to get one of my biggest achievements to date.
At exactly this time tomorrow I plan to be burping from joy, as I celebrate with family, old & new friends and welcome all that Im destined to achieve.

You see I've decided to indulge in the now, as it's all I have to work with & no longer get lost all day in pipe-dreams, as he Time, is like the Gautrain & detests african time.

I'd like to embrace all the good energy encompassing me & simply grow from it.

That said 20Heaven it is...

It's gon be on like a a jammed& b(u)attered scone while I dance with Donkey Kong.

Now allow my Four ( white ) cousins & I two-step our way to Club Euphoria...

It's gon be a party YALL!